THE FEAR OF IT ALL

Oh hello there…

ZC Gang.

ZC NATION.

ZC FAM.

ZC Natives.

Confidential babes.

All of that.

😊

Right.

So how are yous?

My literal favs.

I’m happy to have you here.

Like really…

Thank you for being here.

Thank you for remaining loyal through my ups & downs.

Thank you for riding till the wheels fall off.

& thank you to those who have reached out to me to make sure I’m okay.

Just thank you.

You know?

It means a lot.

& for those of you who are NEW here…

Welcome to the fam 😍

We’re quite the friendly, humorous, quirky, wisdom filled, spiritually supportive bunch.

Not to toot our own horns.

But hey you’re a part of us now so toot toot.

Accidental Release

To the few of you that caught this blog when it accidentally dropped yesterday (Sunday) you have been summoned to comment again.

🤣

But can we talk about how life is always teaching you things?

I had quite the "aha" "lightbulb moment today as I planned to add some content for my loves who already read this.

In that moment I was reminded of exactly what I blogged about quite recently actually.

About how imperative it is to give yourself time before speaking or acting in order not to make a decision you may regret based off emotion.

Because...

So much can positively change after you give yourself time to process things or understand your own emotions/motives & the consequences of your actions before acting on them.

Yesterday...

I was fully emersed in my "take the high road" vibes.

Great vibe to have.

Then this morning after hearing some news from friends/supporters about the LIES being spread about me & the integrity of my blog being questioned from people who've never even subscribed to read it...

I was really ready to go OFF!

Bc ppl are SO damn jealous of this blog you guys.

Ppl cannot stand the force that is ZC NATION.

They can't stand the genuine connections I have built here.

They really can't.

& it's humorous really.

But also oh so SAD.

The inception of this blog began WAY before LI & will continue to thrive LONG after LI.

Despite the enemies attempt to destroy it.

& THAT'S ON PERIOD 💁🏾‍♀️

So although I was ready to act on emotion & say/post some things today I will be refraining.

I think I'll keep ammo locked & loaded instead.

Sit back & let the enemy do itself in.

Bc "NO FREE PROMO"

🙃

What are we discussing today?

I really wanted to take todays blog time to talk about: F E A R!

I wanted to talk about what my current circumstance is teaching me about fear.

Because I must admit…

As much as I want to be an ice queen & move on immediately from the hurt I am currently dealing with by putting on a strong face & releasing a blog topic that is not what’s on my heart right now…

I feel the serious need to be transparent.

& grow through my lessons with you.

My family.

I mean who else would I talk to about this?

The Love Island therapist?

Well sure (& trust me I’ve been utilizing her)

Lol.

But let’s be real…

There’s no one like ZC!

ZC feels me.

So if I were to pound out these confidential blogs on topics my heart wasn’t in in REAL time simply to get out content every Monday you wouldn’t feel me.

You wouldn’t.

So…

Let’s go!

Let me keep it real.

It’s been a very intense week for me.

There's been...

A lot of emotional pain.

A lot of missing someone I feel I shouldn’t miss.

Someone many tell me I shouldn’t miss.

& someone I know I shouldn't miss.

But I can’t lie to you.

There’s been...

A lot of emotional distress.

Not only for me but for my family.

My family has been really hurt by the downplaying of the connection he & I shared.

& the individual connection they each shared with him.

& the lack of accountability.

Especially my mum.

It's hit her hard.

But my brothers are hurt too.

Bc they could’ve sworn it was all just as real as it felt.

Despite the all "business" narrative that has been painted.

I too have "proof".

Texts.

Receipts.

But there’s no point in trying to prove something.

I know the truth.

T knows the truth.

But most importantly God knows the truth.

& I want God to make that judgement.

Vengeance is the Lords.

The second I speak more on things… God will no longer fight my battle for me.

As for the rest of the things I could reveal, I am making a conscious decision to not be spiteful or judge mental of those things but to let God himself expose them.

We both know the things I have chosen not to speak out loud on or be judgmental over.

I've said enough.

& I need to give the rest of this battle to the big man upstairs.

I do severely pray that peace comes over both of us.

Bc I’m definitely hurting.

& if he's any ounce of the person I got to know within those private moments we shared that made me trust in him & what I thought we had above ALL red flags... then he is too.

& for that I send sincere prayers T’s way.

🙏🏾

So what exactly have I learned thus far?

I have learned once again that fear isn’t real.

Don't get me wrong at all.

Fear is a normal & necessary element for survival.

But fear isn't real.

Before this news hit the public I lived in fear of what the haters would say.

Fear of breaking fans hearts.

Fear of losing my integrity to ZC NATION.

Fear of the regret I may feel after exposing private conversations.

Fear of doing the podcast with Murad & losing people who may have been open to listening had I not chosen to do it with him.

Fear of exposing someone I deeply cared about.

Fear of people dismissing the beauty that was in the relationship despite the major issues.

Fear of letting go of the relationship too quickly before it could get “better”.

Fear of being embarrassed.

Just fear guys.

It haunted me.

BUT…

There came a time that I felt was a strong sign from God which reminded me that being afraid of what lies on the other side didn’t mean I could run from doing what needed to be done to set my soul free.

In order to be free I had to let go of fear.

I had to embrace every possibility & consequence.

I had to do it scared.

Bc I couldn’t let that fear rule me.

I couldn’t let it keep me in bondage.

Fear becomes the dark side of you.

It rules you.

You become it’s puppet.

& then it dangerously dictates how you choose to move forward in life.

Once fear is present, so is the devil.

Because that element now controls you.

Fear can also bring you to hate.

& once hate is there you suffer.

Fear additionally affects our emotional health.

Which affects our mental & physical health.

So with fear you have to come out of hiding.

You’ve got to look fear in the face & tell it you’re not afraid.

You’ve got to choose to hate fear.

Defeat it at the source.

How do you defeat fear at the source?

Get in front of it.

Don’t let it sit & eat at you.

Address it.

Then declare that even with what may seem like the scariest of outcomes… you can & will indeed overcome.

We don’t have a choice but to overcome.

What we DO have a choice & control over however is our tongue.

Proverbs 18:21

Life & death live in the tongue.

Declare what you want the outcome of conquering your fear to be.

Declare you are victorious over it.

Let your tongue manifest that positive outcome rather than give into declaring the fear of the negative outcome that is keeping you in bondage.

That’s what I had to do.

I had to ask myself what I was so afraid of at the end of the day & declare that I would experience positive breakthrough if I faced my fears.

I had to hold my own hand & tell myself that I’d be my own best friend when shit hit the fan despite anything else.

& that I deserved to be free of fear.

More help with conquering fear?

Find the Bible.

Find a scripture.

Not just any scripture.

THE scripture.

There's something for EVERYTHING we're going through.

Soak yourself in it.

Know that it's true.

Believe in those words.

Believe in YOU.

& in God.

Deuteronomy 3:22

“Do not be afraid of them; the Lord your God himself will fight for you.”

Deuteronomy 31:6

Be strong and of a good acourage, fear not, nor be afraid of them: for the Lord thy God, he doth go with thee; he will not fail thee, nor forsake thee.

Isaiah 41: 11-13

“All who rage against you will surely be ashamed and disgraced;those who oppose you    will be as nothing and perish.

12 

Though you search for your enemies,    you will not find them.Those who wage war against you    will be as nothing at all.

13 

For I am the Lord your God who takes hold of your right hand and says to you, Do not fear; I will help you".

At times in the past it has been hard for me to really take in the words of the Bible.

I’d read them but not be able to soak them in.

But one thing I know for sure is that the words of the Bible whether I was able to soak them in at the time or not have ALWAYS rung true.

So I hope these scriptures help one of you as they’ve helped me.

I’d love to hear about/read in the comment section on moments in which you overcame fear & realized you had exaggerated the outcome in your mind all along.

Or things you may be going through even right now that have you living in fear that you know you need to triumph over.

You can also choose to express these to me in a private message if you like.

Also please feel free to ask me any questions your heart desires.

It’s been shockingly freeing answering questions for you guys.

We will be back like we never left with ZC very soon.

Ie. The guest blogger, the journals, the merch etc very soon.

Ps/Lil' Side Note: Healing is truly not linear 😓

Lol.

Any advice you have is greatly appreciated.

Till next time ZC NATION.

Confidentially,

Baby Z